Ashleigh’s Story: Finding Resilience in the Midst of SUD

Ashleigh’s life has been deeply shaped by the effects of substance use disorders (SUD), spanning generations and relationships. Both of her parents, as well as the fathers of her three children, continue to struggle with addiction, leaving a lasting impact on her family dynamics.

For Ashleigh’s oldest child, the presence—and absence—of her father is particularly painful. “When he’s sober, he’s such a wonderful, warm person,” Ashleigh shares. “But when he starts to use again, he disappears. It hurts me and my daughter for sure because we appreciate him for who he is, but we’re unsure why he doesn’t stay clean long term.”

The father of Ashleigh’s younger children brought a different kind of heartbreak. “He was an amazing athlete with so much potential—funny and charming,” she recalls. “But his secret addiction unraveled into abuse when I confronted him about it.” For the safety of her children, Ashleigh has cut off contact. Though it was the right decision, she admits to still worrying about him, wondering if one day his addiction will claim his life.

Her parents’ heavy drinking has also left scars. “They were productive drinkers, always putting themselves at the center of their lives,” Ashleigh explains. During her own struggle with addiction, they took temporary custody of her oldest child but alienated her to an extreme degree. It took years of fighting in court and family therapy to reclaim custody. “Their lack of integrity was revealed through their actions and words in court, but custody was awarded back to me,” she says.

Over the past nine months, her parents have reduced their drinking, slowly recognizing the isolation their choices created. However, the years of childhood neglect and trust offenses have left their relationship strained.

Despite the challenges, Ashleigh has found strength and clarity in her sobriety. “SUD tears apart families in ways that are different for everyone,” she reflects. “Being a sober person today, I can practice forgiveness while maintaining boundaries to keep me and my children safe.”

Ashleigh’s journey is one of resilience, hope, and the courage to protect her family while holding space for healing. Her story is a powerful reminder that recovery and forgiveness can coexist with the boundaries necessary for safety and well-being.

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